Entry tags:
vampire trash? me?
[It's been on his mind a lot over the last few weeks, the idea of becoming a vampire. Partially because he's looking older than Arthur these days, and if he lets that go on too long it's going to get pretty weird, but moreover he just feels ready]
[Anxious as fuck, but ready.]
[The idea of it is terrifying — he'd gone to Mal for an explanation of the finer details rather than worry Arthur with his questions, seeing as she's actually done it before and Arthur hasn't — the idea that he could just... Die. It's not one that sits easy with Eames. He rather likes being alive, in fact half the point of becoming a vampire is to keep being alive, for a stretch on the word, forever.]
[So he's been dealing with that a lot, pretending otherwise whenever Arthur notices him being distant or pensive so he can work out his feelings on this without any outside influence. He knows Arthur wouldn't be mad if he changed his mind, it's a huge change to undertake, but it's not that he might not want this so much as wondering if the risks are really worth it.]
[They are.]
[But now they need to talk about it, so Eames is psyching himself up to do exactly that. Offered to stay in and make dinner while Arthur's off doing his errands to give himself some time alone to think about it. Maybe making some significant progress on a bottle of wine to calm his nerves, maybe it'll slow him down enough Arthur won't realise how keyed up he is the second he gets home.]
[Anxious as fuck, but ready.]
[The idea of it is terrifying — he'd gone to Mal for an explanation of the finer details rather than worry Arthur with his questions, seeing as she's actually done it before and Arthur hasn't — the idea that he could just... Die. It's not one that sits easy with Eames. He rather likes being alive, in fact half the point of becoming a vampire is to keep being alive, for a stretch on the word, forever.]
[So he's been dealing with that a lot, pretending otherwise whenever Arthur notices him being distant or pensive so he can work out his feelings on this without any outside influence. He knows Arthur wouldn't be mad if he changed his mind, it's a huge change to undertake, but it's not that he might not want this so much as wondering if the risks are really worth it.]
[They are.]
[But now they need to talk about it, so Eames is psyching himself up to do exactly that. Offered to stay in and make dinner while Arthur's off doing his errands to give himself some time alone to think about it. Maybe making some significant progress on a bottle of wine to calm his nerves, maybe it'll slow him down enough Arthur won't realise how keyed up he is the second he gets home.]
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Strange to think I'm technically dead too.
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[Arthur doesn't really think of it as being dead, though he does think of the night he was turned as the night he died more often than not. He's certainly had more of life by several definitions of the word in the past couple centuries but his heart also hasn't beat once in all that time either. It's a weird distinction.]
[In any case he doesn't really feel like getting into that philosophical discussion right now unless Eames breaches the subject, settling for feeling up his boyfriend's stomach and chest instead, which he does with a frown after a moment.]
You're still so warm though.
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Am I?
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[Arthur says this like he's a little offended by this revelation.]
At first I thought you just hadn't cooled off yet but by now you should have...
[Arthur puts his hand over Eames' heart like he's trying to see if he somehow botched it and half-turned him, but he would have heard a heartbeat by now anyway. Nope, Eames is fully undead, he's just still running hot. What bullshit.]
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Lucky for you, mm?
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[He holds Eames a little tighter.]
I'm always cold.
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[Eames kisses him again and stays nuzzling his cheek afterwards.]
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[It easily could be a sarcastic statement but there's definitely a shmoopy element to his tone as he nuzzles Eames back.]
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Thank you.
[It might be a weird thing to say, but Eames feels like it's important, gaze intent as he looks at Arthur.]
Not just for this, but... These years have been wonderful. Even the things I hated were completely worth it for you. I would've been happy growing old and dying so long as I still had you, I want you to know that.
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I know. I feel the same way..
[His hand goes to Eames’ side and he brushes his palm up and down.]
These have been the best years of my life too. I’m... excited that they never have to end now.
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I love you so much more than I thought I had in me.
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I didn't even know I had it in me at all.
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I get to kiss you after I've had blood now.
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I feel weird about looking forward to that.
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[He lifts his hand to run his fingers through Eames' hair.]
Mal and Dom used to make out while they were drinking from me. I guess I get that temptation now.
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[He's just gonna choose to deal with this feeling by going in for another kiss.]
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[The next night Arthur doesn't really know what to do to keep acclimating Eames to his new life, so he has no plans when he wakes up. He mostly wants to cuddle a bit more.]
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[He comes back to the bedroom, clean as a whistle and totally nude, sipping some blood as he comes to sit at the edge of the bed near Arthur.]
Is it strange that I miss the bruises?
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It's proof that something happened, I guess.
[He tilts his head to look at Eames' hip where a bruise should be but isn't.]
I always felt bad for leaving them on you, though.
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[He tilts his head a little in thought.]
Never really thought about why. Maybe I just liked being with someone strong enough to leave a perfect, lasting print of his hand on my hips.
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